no fiction today, kids: this is 100% real.
it's been a long, hard couple years for me on the emotional front. even as i finished law school and all my professional ambitions came true, my relationship, the one steadfast truth i had throughout my very trying early 20s, became something that, let's face it, didn't work anymore. i was rocked to my core when i realized that. i was in denial. i said things and did things that were completely at odds with my emotions, whatever they happened to be at any given time.
long about january of this year, i decided that writing in my journal and talking to my shrink wasn't cutting the mustard anymore. i needed a more public forum to work through the psychic upheaval. i didn't want to spill the details all over the internet in uncensored form, so i settled on the format you know and love today. largely true, partially fiction. composite characters, wildly extrapolated situations, etc.
and lo and behold, i built it and y'all came. that was a really exciting thing for me: holy hell, people read my work and like it. and as i wrote, things in 100% real life became clearer. through the process of interacting with y'all, telling my story, i came to realize what had to be done. finally, after all my hemming and hawing, i pulled the trigger this week. i am moving forward with my life, trying to catch my emotions up with my professional progress and, y'know, get happy.
so i have to thank everyone here. my little band of readers and friends from far and wide has sustained me through this dark season. in all honesty, even those of y'all who are only known to me through aliases and avatars have been indispensable as i've sorted all of this out. i will always remember the kindness you've shown me as i've blown my life apart and started to rebuild it. you've all played a role in the process. so as i move forward, i plan on keeping y'all updated, spinning my little yarns and dissecting my heart and soul through the art and science of badly-capitalized internet-based essays. i hope y'all stick around. you're all pretty important to me.
thanks, y'all. couldn't have done it without you.
Letter 70: Be Louder
4 weeks ago