i have always thought of myself as a modern woman, a total feminist, liberated in every sense of the word. i'm a career woman (or at least i will be when i get out of school), a sports fan, the whole nine. but it's weird; every so often, i get the urge to get just a tiny bit traditional. y'know, cooking, cleaning, etc. so today, as i sat on the couch with my man and his friends, i watched football, drank, and held my own in all manner of discussions on lebron james, eli manning, and whether the redskins were pathetic or just outclassed.
but i also, without any help from the boys, fixed an entire dinner for them. i brought beer to them, laid out their plates, the whole nine yards. i do this from time to time; i get a weird charge out of being a well-rounded woman (brains and domesticity all in one package!). but it's strange how this guy brings out this instinct in me. when i was in my old relationship, i HATED to cook. dear god, it was such a chore. and it's not like my workload was that much different then than it is now. quite the contrary. but with a new man, a new group of people in my life, and a new outlook on things, i find myself so much more willing to do things like this.
there's a lot of argument in this world about what it means to be a feminist, a liberated woman, etc., etc., etc. i've never been too interested in laying down a definition of appropriate "feminist bona fides." i've always felt like the whole point of being pro-woman is embracing the just infinite menu of choices in this world available to men and allowing that same menu of choice to be available to women at the same time. so i guess it's that same openness that allows me to get into good-natured yelling matches with my man's friends about sports, then turn around and serve them dinner with no issues.
this is modern love. this is modern life. a woman can, and should, stand her ground in her choices, no matter what they are. own who you are in front of the people you love. it's the best way to be true to yourself, and it's the most feminist stand you can take. bake a cake. shoot a gun. cheer like hell for your favorite football team (WHODAT!). just be who you are. if he's a real man, he won't be scared of anything you do. he'll love you all the more for being open, free and honest.
and if he's a keeper, he'll do the dishes. mine did. :)
Letter 70: Be Louder
5 days ago