when you're carrying on two relationships at the same time, there's a lot you have to keep inside. really, it's a lot like what i imagine being involved in organized crime is like, except there's no community to fall back on. even mafiosos have friends "in the life" to talk to when things get weird or stressful. here, not so much. you're pretty much on your own. the only person i can talk to about the other boy (at least in his role as the other boy) is, well, the other boy.
or so i thought. turns out that i'm not the only one with this little wrinkle in her life. i have a friend who also has another boy. and my god in heaven, there's NOTHING better than being able to talk this out with someone who doesn't have a vested interest in the outcome. when i have weird feelings, or things get too intense, i can go to her and talk it out. thank. god. it's saved my sanity a couple of times since all this started.
just goes to show you that there's really no such thing as an easy way out. there's always a wrinkle you never saw coming. thankfully, i have a friend in the life to keep me in check. makes the whole double life thing just a tad bit easier...
Letter 70: Be Louder
5 days ago