i am a low-maintenance chick, as these things go. not that i'm a doormat or anything. i just don't require a whole lot of relationship upkeep. i'm pretty easy. i'm not a princessy kind of girl who needs expensive dates all the time. i don't keep the man from his friends, insisting that he accompany me on errands or all those other things that TV tells me women are supposed to do to men. i don't criticize his clothing choices (out loud, even when i want to, and believe you me, there are times when he has it coming). i pretty much give him latitude.
i have some non-negotiable requirements, though. they're small, but they are 100% locked-in and necessary. you can't avoid them. you need to be good to me. you need to support me. and for the love of all things sacred and holy, you have to make an effort to make room for me in your life. that's just not something that can be bargained away. it's just not an option. if you want the benefits that come with being with me, you have to cede a little bit of your independence and, every so often, try for me.
thankfully, so far, the man seems to understand this. he may be a loner, but he's made some room for me. it's not an easy task for him. i know why it isn't. it's not like i haven't seen this movie; i've known him for his entire dating life, seen him with each and every one of his girlfriends. i know what it's been like in the past. but it's my turn now. those girls had different needs from me, needs that were in some ways more petty than mine and in others way deeper than i could ever address. but he's been so good for all our lives at silently being there for me. will my lone wolf be able to give what a man has to give me to satisfy me emotionally? that will be the challenge. he's been amazing so far. let's see if he can make the jump.
Letter 70: Be Louder
5 days ago