i know i'm grown. it's pretty much obvious at this point; i've lived outside a parent's supervision for over 10 years now, i've paid my taxes for just as long, and i know about things like buying insurance and paying doctor's bills. but tonight was one of those nights that reinforces to me that i am definitely, irrevocably and completely GROWN UP. y'know, a WOMAN and all that.
i had dinner with some friends, and we chatted about everything and nothing for awhile. one of these folks has a distinctly entrepreneurial bent, and somehow, he got inspired about something as we talked. fast-forward two hours, and he, with a few items of input from the rest of us, is well on his way to hatching the NEXT BIG IDEA. he even had questions for me. stuff like this makes me nervous. i know that i know a fair amount, but i'm not always 100% confident in my intellect, especially when i've been drinking (like i did tonight - hell, it was a birthday party). but he was genuinely interested in a) what i know about my field and b) how that knowledge could work for his idea.
now if that ain't adulthood, i don't know what is. i don't recall exactly when it was that we passed the point where all we talked about was relationships, TV shows, sports and hooking up. but i guess this is how it goes. we're all almost 30, if not already there. there's a thirtieth birthday party for one of us (not me, thank the gods) coming up in a couple of weeks. we talk about business, our livelihoods, our careers, etc. now. good god. i have relevant things to add to these conversations. we all do. we are so not kids anymore. i don't know whether it's liberating or scary. a lot from column A, a little from column B, i think.
tonight drove home some truths about my life, my attitude towards things, and how i've evolved over the years. but it also shows me that it's not just me that's evolving; it's all of us. well, almost all of us, anyway. to quote the bible (i know, an atheist quoting the bible; it's weird): when i was a child, i spoke like a child, i thought like a child, i reasoned like a child; when i became an adult, i put an end to childish ways. (for those keeping score at home, that's 1 corinthians 13:11.) this is really what's happened in my life; i've (largely) moved past the silliness of my childhood. i'm grown now. and because i am grown, it's time to check in with all the things in my life, no matter how good they are, and see what matches my adulthood. if something i'm clinging to can't match up with the reality of adulthood, it's time to put an end to it.
well. to quote the immortal blink-182, i guess this is growing up. in a way, it sucks. but really, i wouldn't have it any other way.
Hello world!
9 months ago
I'm with you. A lot of A and a little of B. Ever sit back and think HOW did we get here?
ReplyDeleteoh yeah. it's pretty much a constant theme in my mind.
ReplyDeleteYour friend's idea sounds really cool--do you know what it's going to be?
ReplyDeletenot exactly - he's kinda cagey when he gets an idea like this. it'll be interesting to see what he does with it. he's a tech guy, so i'm not sure i'll understand it if/when he does anything... :)
ReplyDeleteI miss my friends.
ReplyDeleteLove this post! People think because I have a nostalgia blog that I must think of high school as "the good old days." Nothing could be further from the truth. Even with adult responsibilities, I wouldn't go back to childhood (particularly adolescence) for a million bucks. My blog helps me deal with the unhappiness I felt back then.
ReplyDeleteSo Yay! for thinking like an adult and being an adult!
You know I almost never feel "grown"...I'm always feeling like I still don't get it yet, like I'm still changing, like I'm the clueless teenager I was years and years ago...and then I look around and notice that I have a degree and a career, own a home and two cars, have been married for three years...and it feels weird. But a good weird (I think).
ReplyDeleteGrowing up ain't for sissies, that's for certain.
ReplyDeleteI hope your friend is astoundingly successful and shares a little bit of that success with you. :)